Vitenka: 1554
I made this / Cat Games - Less lag, more 'thats bad'
/ MORAT / freespace / Catnews / Editorial
There's nothing to see here except for shadows of the past - and these ones won't be returning.

I'd point you to my next project here - but I'm not that organised. My style is to act and then sort out the consequences, rather than the other way around. Oh, and lying. I do that a lot too. (i.e. if you look closely, you may have seen some links appearing roughly once a week) is registered to me for the forseeable future, so you might find something there.

Edited by Vitenka at 2003-04-09 08:22:54

Vitenka : Wed 14 10:05:10 2001  

Coldfire's fault!

I recently 'discovered' this, through the usual process of making it up at somene else's insistence. It bears a passing resemblance to Lesson two and probably has something to do with that horrible affront. horrible affront

So, here we go.

Here is the first rule you must learn. NEVER run a news site. EVER. You simply are *not* any good at it. You will help your bank account more by selling something else. It is *not* as easy as it looks.

Now, once you've learned the first rule, you may learn the second: Only when you are good enough to totally lock down a group of users, and you aren't needed elsewhere (eg at work) and only then:

*STILL* don't run an ad network. Oh, you can be a poster on slashdot. Your best strategy is for three of you to flame the uber-geek.

Forget about pop-ups. After that, what else to say?

Don't stay in one place, keep moving. Never show your real address to the enemy. Don't crow about your kills. Don't get caught up in a fight with your opposing number (no-one gains) Don't miss anything If you do miss something, *tell* your team, so they can cover for your balls up. When needed elsewhere, leave the battlements, and guard something else.

Do things they don't expect, like going on offence (If they see an advertising executive in a dark corner, they often dont fire, assuming that it'll be theirs)

And finally: *do*not* run a news site.

You need to be a godlike shot, and have a very good ping to stand a chance at hitting anything in this fast paced world.

You are better off as a bank manager otherwise.

Oh, all right, lets be sensible. Let us assume that you ARE good enough to run a news site. Some of you are. I reckon (post patch) about 20 people have the required skills in the UK scene. Maybe 30.

Lesson 1: 3 adverts are not sufficiently better than 1.

OK? I won't claim they are no better. If I see three dots, I know I'm in for trouble, and if one of those dots is good, and the executives work together to cover all my options, I'm dead.

But there are always alternate routes, and you've used a LOT of manpower, and you CAN be supressed....

A news site in a field. Maybe 2, but only if your team really needs it. TOPS.

What are the chances 6 of the top 20 executives end up on the same team anyway?

Lesson 2: The onExit advert.

Damn good weapon, hitscan, unlimited range, 100% accurate, rapid ROF, but does little damage. Use it if you want to be sure of doing SOME damage and are about to die, or if you are SURE your charged shot almost killed them. Don't use it on a fully armoured network, you will look exceedingly foolish.

Lesson 3: Hip shooting Ad-networks CAN fight. I may regret explaining this, but:

Quickly dodge from side to side to prevent people managing to lock on to you - rapidly change direction so that you stay centered on your objective, while still being hard to track. Then fire your weaponry. You may have to hold it slightly - but you don't need to hold it for long.

Do NOT forget your pops. Let me say that again, so that you notice it some more. DO NOT FORGET TO USE YOUR POP_UPS. Adverts don't kill people, POP-UPS kill people.

Lesson 4: Leg shot. If you aint gonna monetise them, track them - gives them enough annoyance to make their next shot miss, and enough long term annoyance for you to finish them off. Just doing damage is good, slowing them down is probably better.

Monetised sites are best, they'll probably kill them - though uncharged they aint so hot. But even an uncharged track is a permanent hamper until they get healing...

Oh yeah, that means it doesn't apply so much to geeks.

Lesson 5: Work with your team. If a teammember is DMing something light/medium, it doens't need your help. If a teammate is DMing a netowrk, shoot it. Do NOT accidentally shot your teammate. Learn the way your teammates dodge.

Lesson 6: Stepping The net has an interesting movement code - unless someone is in browse mode, then they can only change directions on a step. Ignore the way they face, and watch the feet - if they are rapidly stepping one way then the other (the most common dodge) then you've got two places to aim: Mid cycle, they MUST be there, but not for very long. Probably the hardest to time. At the edge. They are stationary relative to our view for a moment. Go for it.

Lesson 7: Minimise their angles. Obviously, use a choke point. If not available, stand on the same level as them to minimise their up/down options - and make back/forward less useful. If you can get them going directly toward / away from you, they die.

Lesson 8: Cover is good, but doesn't last You're the same as a SG - move around, be less predictable. Let them waste their ammo on where you were a few minutes ago, not where you are now.

Staying still so they can't see you is good - until they see you. Then dodge.

Lesson 8.5 Not TOTALLY related to those, but... (probably) DON'T GUARD THE NO MANS LAND MOST of the itme, you'll simply end up in sniping war with your opposing number. This means that you are doing almost nothing to help your team.

You'd be MUCH better off guarding some choke point - the portal, or maybe on offence (offensive adverts will be covered elsewhere in 'unusual attack methods' - suffice to say here that is damn good when done well, but damn hard to do well. Best as anti SG / network and for surprise value)

Guarding no mans land (the space between the sites) is HARD because there is a lot of area to cover.

It is easier than some chokes because you get longer to target the consumer - but the number of consumers in the area usually offsets this. As a basic rule - do NOT cover the space between areas if you can find somewhere more useful to be. If you MUST cover the area between the sites, do it from a less expected position, the built in 'banner spaces' on most sites are just put there to fool newbies into walking into a deathtrap.

Lesson 10: Snap shot Aiming then firing is only of use to executives and (lesser) management. Swing your sights across the target, and release at the correct mooment - I find it easier to hit if I'm not conciously aiming, you may too. also more use to other classes, or when you're in a close up firefight.

Lesson 11: Trust me. Don't run a news site. Really.

There are about 20 or 30 people I would consider excluding from this edict. Maybe 5 or so I can name. They are good enough. You are not.

Lesson 12: Don't run a news site. Really. It's worth saying twice. Or about 40 times like I do here.

Not that I'm looking to cut down on the competition or anything.

When I say "don't run a news site" BTW, I don't mean "don't use the net" that would be a heresy!

No, I simply mean that unless you are the best of the best of the best, you would probably be more use to your team as another class. Bank managers, netowkrs and portals probably require less skill to be effective, and can still play roughly the same role.

Older News  
Main News>>>


[Froody Comics]

[Nifty Links]
[Guilt Box]
You owe:
['Tenkas Tips]

This HTML design by Vitenka
I'm aware it sucks, but am also too lazy.
Note that now you've changed all the colours, it could be about anything!
BTW - this site looks fine in IE5 and netscape4. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find it, maybe you can use - Netscape 2.